


Things That Go Bump in the Night

by rizahawteye



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Awkward Sexual Situations, Camping, Desperation, Drabble, Drunken Shenanigans, Drunkenness, Embarrassment, Exhibitionism, Ficlet, Implied Sexual Content, Internal Conflict, Internal Monologue, M/M, Non-Explicit Sex, POV Third Person, Road Trips, Secret Relationship, Short & Sweet, Swearing, Tent Sex, but it's not meant to be sexy, it's just a fact
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-18 10:06:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29856456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rizahawteye/pseuds/rizahawteye
Summary: Noctis doesn't always wake up in the middle of the night, but when he does, he prefers to not overhear his best friends in the throes of passion.
Relationships: Gladiolus Amicitia/Ignis Scientia, Prompto Argentum/Noctis Lucis Caelum
Comments: 2
Kudos: 45





	Things That Go Bump in the Night

It’s not often that Noctis awakes in the middle of the night. He’s the heaviest sleeper of the bunch. Even on the rare mornings when Ignis lets him sleep in, he’s incredibly difficult to rouse, grumbling and pulling his sleeping bag back over his face while he snoozes his alarm multiple times. The combination of his magic overuse, his childhood injury, narcolepsy, and just the rough life on the road aren’t kind to his stamina reserves. Anyway, this is quite an unusual situation. Several things are happening at once, each one more unnerving than the last.

First of all, the chocobos are loudly squawking by the campfire. Grappling over their greens, or just having nightmares, who knows. But it’s certainly annoying. Their rambunctious _kwehs!_ were what initially startled him from his slumber. As much as he adores the feathery companions, he really wishes he’d sent them back to the ranch before camping on this night in particular.

The second problem is the result of throwing back a few too many beers during their cookout earlier. In celebration of completing a grueling hunt that had involved tracking their prey halfway across Duscae, the party had cleared out an entire Coernix Station’s stock of libations. Gathered around the bonfire, they became increasingly unhinged, and their laughter had drowned out the menacing screeches of the daemons patrolling the surroundings until well after midnight. Unfortunately, a few hours later, the alcohol is still working its way through Noct’s system, and his bladder is throbbing. He knows he’d only have to stumble a few steps out of the tent to relieve himself off the edge of the haven’s plateau. However, his stomach clenches when he realizes that this is currently not possible.

The third and final problem is that Noctis is not the only one awake. It’s not an issue of privacy - they’re all past that initial embarrassment of tending to one’s needs in the backcountry. Noctis could easily clamber over the sleeping Prompto, whose nasally breathing would carry on undisturbed, but his other companions pose a greater obstacle. Gone are Ignis’ quiet, even exhales and Gladio’s muffled snores. Instead, Noctis hears the sleeping bags swishing from bodily movement, two sets of labored lungs, and something that sounds… wet?

And then he hears the unmistakable smack of a kiss. Several, in fact. A chorus of raw groans and soft whimpers. Oh, Gods. He doesn’t need to guess who is making what noises - he can easily detect the gravelly timbre and exotic accent buried beneath the outcries of pleasure.

Noctis wills himself to fall back asleep, but it’s all too much. This is, by far, the most uncomfortable situation of his life. He’d traipse through sewers to slay enormous snakes, he’d scale Ravatogh barefoot, he’d eat an entire goddamn garden of vegetables, any day, over this. On top of annoyance, a myriad of emotions are coursing through him: he’s happy for his friends, he supposes, they do make a good pair; he’s also incredibly mortified that he’s witnessing this private moment; glad that there’s at least one person in between them that’s effectively blocking any visuals; and impressed (particularly with the ever-composed Ignis) that they’d be this bold in such close proximity to others, even if they were dead asleep. He’s sure the haze of alcohol is a contributing factor to the last one.

But above all else, Noctis just has to piss, so fucking bad. His stomach aches. He absurdly wishes there was an empty bottle nearby, he’s that desperate. And unfortunately tonight he’s ended up farthest from the only entrance of the tent - there’s no way he can leave undetected. He distantly remembers Gladio eyeing a luxury tent, with two zippered doorways, in a gear shop in Insomnia months ago, and regrets not using his royal authority to make him buy it instead of this canvas prison.

If only it were Prompto he’d caught in the act, then this could be kind of sexy. But here he is, laying in the dark trying not to soil his sleeping bag, waiting for his two friends to finish - _literally._ This road trip itinerary is full of surprises.

Noctis can’t even move. He wants to smash his pillow over his ears to drown out the noises. Even the chocobos outside have quieted down now. Gladio and Ignis don’t seem close to… being done, so Noctis resorts to thinking about literally anything else. An interesting flower he saw the other day that Iris would like. Getting lost in Lestallum last week and ending up in a shop that only sold Kenny Crow memorabilia. Cor Leonis. How badly he wants to spend an entire weekend fishing. Fishing pond - water - no - he can’t think about liquids. Ummm. He kind of needs a haircut. Cindy’s accent - where the hell is she from? The view from the top of the arches on a clear starry night. The bitter taste of Ebony - wait, no drinks! How are Pryna and Umbra doing? Prompto’s freckles in golden afternoon light…

Noctis successfully forces his mind to stray from the present situation, and he’s nearly drifting off to sleep again when he hears a string of curses and choked grunts from the other side of the tent. Then there are soft chuckles, unintelligible but clearly amorous whispers, sleeping bags zipping back up, a good-night kiss, and finally, _finally_ the familiar breathing patterns of sleep overcoming the two exhibitionists.

Ten more minutes, just to be sure, and then Noctis is scrambling out of the tent - he may have accidentally trodden on Prompto’s wrist - oh well. He sprints to the edge of the haven, tripping over his own feet on the way. Blissful relief washes over him, and the sun is just emerging over the horizon as he zips the tent back up behind him.

Noctis crawls back into his sleeping bag, hoping to enjoy a few more hours of sleep and avoid a hangover. But as soon as he’s settled in, the formerly sleeping body next to him flips over, and Prompto’s staring, wide eyed and dumbfounded, jaw hanging open in shock.

“Noct! What the hell!”

“Sorry, didn’t mean to step on you,” Noct mutters.

“No, dude, you’re fine, I was already awake, did you _hear that?_ ” he scream-whispers.

“Holy shit… you were awake? The whole time? Prom, I’ve been waiting to get up to pee for _an hour_ , it was miserable! I thought they’d never fini- um. Be… done.”

“I was pretending to be asleep! What else could I do! Did you know about them?” 

“No, not at all. I mean, it’s fine, I don’t care, as far as I know, like, royally, it’s allowed. I just never thought… not in the _tent,_ ” Noctis squeezes his eyes shut, trying to scrub the memories of the last hour from his brain, and he really wishes he wasn’t having this conversation. “Did… you know?”

“Not...not really, I mean, there was one other time I woke up and… that was happening, I thought maybe I was just dreaming (Noct snickers at this) ...not _fantasizing,_ asshole, it was a _nightmare_ , they went on forever! But otherwise, I never caught them doing anything else suspicious.”

“Well… it’s not a big deal I guess. Good for them. And if they ever find out about _us_ , then we can throw it in their faces,” Noctis smirks. “Anyways, I wanna sleep more. G’night, Prom.”

“It’s morning, Noct,” he teases.

Noctis responds by flicking Prompto in the forehead before he sighs and gratefully succumbs to a few more hours of rest.

**Author's Note:**

> Breakfast tomorrow will certainly be awkward...
> 
> I might expand on this and add Gladio and Ignis' point of view, but for now, use your imagination to figure out exactly what they're doing! ;)
> 
> Unrelated to this fic, but I've been imagining/writing FFXV fic for a few years now and I'm finally feeling bold enough to post. I hope you enjoy, and don't mind the random headcanons I've sprinkled throughout (like Noctis being narcoleptic, like me!), and look forward to many more postings in the future!


End file.
